I was recently talking to someone about my tour in Afghanistan and how the death of my friend there affected me. As I was talking about it I got quite angry and upset. After thinking about it for a few days I figured out why…
I wanted to have a proper memorial for him and there was some discussion about dedicating part of the armory in his name as well as a few other schemes but, much to my dismay, interest waned quickly among the leadership in the unit. I lobbied as hard as I could but the best I could wrangle out of the command was a vague promise to ‘look into things’ when we got home. It seemed a bit ridiculous to me since I knew that when we got home the last thing on anyone’s mind was going to be how to memorialize him. People would be moving on, leaving the unit, new members would be coming in and everyone would be focused on getting back to civilian life. As soon as they said it I knew they were giving me the blow off. What they ended up doing was naming a conference room for him in a building in Afghanistan that has probably been torn down already and drove by the cemetery on our way home. As far as I know, that was the extent of the memorial for the first soldier of that unit to die in the line of duty since the Second World War.
I did however, make a contribution in his name at the Gettysburg Battlefield and town of Gettysburg. He was a huge Civil War buff and would always rave about the Gettysburg reenactments he took part in. I solicited everyone in the company three or four times to see in anyone wanted to contribute. To the best of my memory, four of us eventually did. I have to admit I was surprised by the lack of interest and participation from everyone. It was like they were in a whole different army then we were.
Oh, wait…it gets worse.
I was also reminded how only one person bothered to ask how I was doing after he passed away and that was a guy who had only been in our unit for a few months by that time and wasn’t much more than an acquaintance to me. No chaplain, no commander, nobody else (for whatever reason) spoke to me about him for the remaining seven months we were there.
Absolutely some of the worst senior leaders (Sergeant-Major and Field Grade officers anyway) that I’ve ever had the misfortune to serve with. I should say that we did have some good leaders but my unit was so top heavy that any promising leader was quickly squashed.
Hmmm…I think I’m beginning to see the origins of my disillusionment with the Army now.
Fortunately, his reenactor companions did the right thing and created a great way to memorialize him.
